I was having a rough time choosing which avenue to post this too, but since it is a relationship issue I’ll go with the social segment. Today’s topic is the way titles effect our relationship and the way we love. If someone is given the title supervisor; employees automatically have a higher level of respect. In this instance, why is respect conditional? If someone is given the title mother; certain demands are needed. In this instance, if they fall short should they be condemned for their entire life? These titles hold the same power in relationships.
I am the girl that can date for a year before I commit. I am also the girl that expects more when a title is given. As Fabolous says it, I prefer a “situationship” because it’s free, unconditional, and fun. So I’m going to tell this story to maybe help people save their own relationships.
I was the helpless romantic that found love in a hopeless place. Just kidding I was actually indecisive and wasn’t looking. However, through a gaze I found it. It started off small simply flirting, as most people do. Than dates got involved, which were fun. It was as if I found a best friend and love mixed into one. After this sex got involved, and boy was it heightened; a climax I can say I never hit. When you’re just kicking it with a person there is no conditions, which means both parties are still free to do as the wish. The thought of that made me demand a title because me being the egotistical person I am would not allow me to come second to anyone.
At first we had early relationship jitters as everyone does. It feels as if you’re in a blissful world in which only the two of you inhabit. Everyday was fun and every night was passionate. However, as time passed the relationship changed. It went from fun to serious and conditional because we both expected more from the commitment. Why were things different when there was no title? When we went by our names it was acceptable for us both to be ourselves. When you add the title lover that guarantees passion. When we add the titles boyfriend or girlfriend, that guarantees a conformed personality. When you add the title spouse that guarantees a bind of finances and everything else. Something that was once free now requires thought. When the path starts bumpy eventually a road block is going to be hit, and it was.
So I was told, “I’m breaking up with you for us.” In my mind that meant just take my heart and crumble it in your hand, than step on it while you’re at it. However, I’m now realizing that was the best decision ever. We’re not only back to being friends, but we are back to being ourselves. The passion and love is back to being unconditional and free.
I told this story to say, do not let titles get you bent out of shape. Lead with love and not a condition. A soul tie is what bonds people a title just solidifies it for the public. You can put definitions on people. Don’t let titles such as, lover, boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, or wife make you forget the reason you love a person. If someone changes to fit a condition that is the same as losing a person. Save your relationships by not getting so caught up on conditions and titles, but by loving freely.
I want to end by saying this week’s theme was free love and acceptance. When most people think of free love they think LGBT, but free love can be a issue heterosexual couples have as well. Free love is love without condition no matter who it’s with. Free love is the key to a long life. So everyone please love freely.