People Hurt Not Words by BreC

Carter attended Northpoint High School, and from the moment he entered he knew he was different from the other guys. Jocks and their cheer leader girlfriends ran the school. From Carter’s stature you would think he was a jock, but he actually was a cheerleader. Carter was not gay, but he identified more with women because he was raised by his mother. He understood their sensitivity and wanted to help them the best way he could. The jocks, nerds, computer geeks, emos, cool kids, and every other kid had a field day with this decision. He was constantly called a sissy, oversized faggot, and tranny. Each day at home he would cry silently to himself because he knew each day at school he would be tormented. The words got too be overwhelming to the point he would hear sissy, oversized faggot, and tranny in his mind when he daydreamed and in his dreams when he slept.

On Monday, March 2, 2015, his mother went to wake him as she normally would. When she looked in his room everything was neat and she realized he wasn’t there. This was a shock to her because he never wakes up on time, and she would have to beg him to clean his room. She called his cellphone and got no response. This wasn’t odd because sometimes he didn’t always answer. At 10am two police officers came to her door, passed her a letter, and said “Ma’am we need you to come to the coroners and identify your son because we found him on the train tracks. When she looked down at the note in her hand it read at the end in big, bold, black letters ” I JUST WANT TO BE ACCEPTED.”

Approximately 105 Americans die a day from suicide. This is about 38,000 people each year (CDC). One of the reasons is because people hurt, not words. When people take time out to make fun of people they do not stop and think of the torment that is caused. Each time the boy that is a little feminine is called a faggot, it’s programmed in his mind that his personality is not socially accepted. Each time a girl is called a whore because she wears short skirts its programmed in her mind her style is not socially accepted. People do not stop and think how this effects people. The boy that is teased could be at his breaking point because he is at war with his sexuality. The girl that is teased could be at her breaking point because she is really a virgin and can’t understand people’s cruelty. As a bully you have to think, is it okay to be a murderer? If I was to go to trial would I get life? This sounds extreme, but the result of someone’s words ended someone’s life.

If you are a person that feels like you can no longer deal with life, seek therapy because your life is worth it, and your death doesn’t only effect you. Use the National Suicide Prevention Hotline 18002738255. It’s available 24/7 for English and Spanish speakers. If you are a bully remember words don’t kill, but people do! So if you are using your words to kill you are a murderer. 

   
 

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Social Me: Free Love & Acceptance by Bri Alexander

Hey Guys and Gals! This month on Social me, we will look at the concept of well-being from a more abstract perspective: free love and acceptance. What does it mean to love? Furthermore, what is free love and how does that relate to the concept of acceptance? In our society, we have the definition of love that is plastered on our television screens, blasting our radios and spread throughout our books- but, what about other, non-traditional types of love? Instead of recipes and exercises, today I am going to take you all inside an exclusive interview I had with two people part of the LGBT family, the new revolutionary type of love. As they attest to what it is like to experience a different type of love and how they feel, it is with the highest hopes that a new definition of love and self-acceptance can be sparked and understood.  

Interviewee 1: Damien Moody
1. How do you identify yourself and when did you realize this?

I am a gay black male who has sex change plans. If I can fully remember……I was between 6-9. I had a strange attraction to men but hid my real sexuality for many years due to judgement and also the verbal and physical abuse because people knew and thought I was gay. I also met a lot of Homophobic bullies.

2. What was/is the hardest thing about your experience with identifying yourself and how do/did you cope with it?

The hardest thing I ever went through was the abuse I endured from bullies at schools I went to as well as the drama I suffered because of my oldest brother. He used to bully and abuse me mainly calling me gay slurs and threatening me.

I just suffered the abuse for years until I was old enough to fight back and stay away

3. Are you proud of who you are and is there any person/thing in particular that currently inspires you?

I am very happy with who I became and I will be happy with my future as well. My biggest inspiration is Rupaul.

4. What is some advice that you would give to others in the process of “coming out” and accepting him/herself?

Don’t let anyone stop you from being you. Rupaul say all the time ” If u can’t love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love someone else?” No matter what…… You cannot love or accept anyone before you love and accept yourself. I don’t care if your gay, bisexual, bi-curious, transgendered, transsexual…….you must be you and do not let anyone stop your shine. I been through abuse, bullying, suicide attempts and so much more and survived putting God first. You can do it to and prayer answers every question you have.

Interviewee 2: Keyana Smith

1. How do you identify yourself and when did you realize this?

I identify myself as a lesbian and I realized this when I didn’t like talking to boys or when they did not interest me. When I dated my current girlfriend and I felt comfortable with myself.

2. What was/is the hardest thing about your experience with identifying yourself and how do/did you cope with it?

This was when I was comfortable with myself but I knew my family wouldn’t like it, so I thought that I would take my life. I was thinking that I didn’t want to let my family down so I’d rather take my life before I do that.

3. Are you proud of who you are and is there any person/thing in particular that currently inspires you?

I am very proud of who I am and my girlfriend inspires and lets me know every day that I need to be proud of that.

4. What is some advice that you would give to others in the process of “coming out” and accepting him/herself?

That you should come out and love yourself. People are going to talk about you but the best thing you can do is be you. Never live for someone else because of how you think they will react because at the end of the day you have to make yourself happy and live for you.

 A special thanks to Damien Moody and Keyana Smith for their bravery in sharing their stories. Sometimes, it is the most difficult thing that is the most instrumental. There are a plethora of people who struggle with the choice of whether to express their real, true love for self and others. This month and all months we at Save the Charms encourage all individuals to be open-minded and defy society’s attempt to define love in the one-dimensional context that it often appears.

Here are a list of websites that offer support for acceptance and the process of identity formation:

http://lgbt-social-group.meetup.com/cities/us/pa/philadelphia/

http://www.cision.com/us/2011/06/top-10-lgbt-websites-and-blogs/

http://www.itgetsbetter.org/